We decided in August of 2008 to start trying for our first child. It didn't take long. I found out I was pregnant September 25, 2008. I woke up that morning and knew I was pregnant, but I didn't say a word. I stopped at the drug store on the way to work and bought a $3 pregnancy test which I took at work in the bathroom (lovely, I know....). The (+) showed up immediately and I almost fainted. I went to the gift shop and packed John a little surprise goody bag, complete with baby rattle and lovingly wrapped pregnancy test.
He opened the bag when we got home and was so excited. At that moment I began to sob...and I couldn't stop. I wasn't ready to be a mom. Can we stop right here and just wait a while? Nope. It doesn't work like that. So what to do.....
I went to mom's. The only logical next step. Two hours later I was fine. This was going to be good stuff. And I was stoked. Until 3 weeks later when the morning sickness hit. Morning sickness, by the way, is a misnomer. They should call it "all day sickness". The smell of my own house made me puke, let alone the smell of anything fried or smoky. It was going to be a long 7 more months.
A week later, tragedy struck. I got a call from my husband. He was crying. I had never heard John cry. "Brandi overdosed," he said. "She's at the hospital and it doesn't look good.". Brandi was his baby sister. She had been battling drug addiction for several years. I called my boss, snatched up my stuff, and flew like a bat out of hell down the interstate. By the time I got there, she was gone. She was only 28. After the memorials and the goodbyes, and explaining to 4 precious children that their mommy was in Heaven, we tried to get our lives back to normal and prepare for our own little one.
After that, pregnancy was smooth. I should have known that it wouldn't be that easy!
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